In The Name Of Love

                Marting Luther King Jr. once said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.  Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”  It is that thought that echoes in my mind as I think about the ever famous chapter 13 in the Apostle Paul’s letter to the church, the letter of 1 Corinthians- the chapter commonly referred to as “The Love Chapter”; arguably one of the most famous passages in Scriptures.  As Adolf Harnack once said, it is “the greatest, strongest, deepest thing Paul ever wrote”.  So please, for a moment, entertain my thoughts as I discuss this most critical piece of literature.

In our life, in our culture, in the history there can be no doubt of a certain struggle that has plagued humanity since the dawn of time.  It is the never-ending war with hate.  There are many different theories as to why this is, even amongst the greatest minds of theology.  And while we can argue over whether it is total depravity, some outside influence of an evil force, or the environment in which we are raised- there is no arguing the fact that hate has had a predominant hand in all of the human tragedies caused by the hand of another.  Hate has been more deadly than all plagues known to man; and yet, rather than fight for a cure, we dive more deeply into it. 

My friends, this ought not to be.  When we all see that sin that causes so much death enveloping us like a poisonous fog, the answer is not to continue breathing in the toxin; rather, we should flee it to the only cure known to man, the only solution to bring us from this chasm- Love. 

But instead of love, we find ourselves pitted against each other over petty things.  We instead turn to exalting things about ourselves that, without love, are completely irrelevant.  We think ourselves holy in the exercise of our spirituality, talents and gifts; yet in the absence of love, and therefore, in the absence of God Himself- who looks away from our self-glorifying works.  We believe ourselves to be something wonderful; yet when lacking love, we are just an empty shell.

It is for this very reason that we find Paul addressing the Corinthian Church on matters of love.  They had fallen into the trap of the Pharisee, seeing the great and marvelous actions at their own hand; listening to their own muttered prayers and supposed speaking in tongues of angels; holding themselves upon a pedestal above others.  When one felt he was “blessed” with a gift, he would look down upon another whom he felt was less blessed, not as righteous as he.  They would boast in their gifts while ignoring the glaring issue that all they did was vacant of love for God and love for others.

This was the background for chapter 13.  In 12, Paul first addressed the use of gifts and the reality that what you do outwardly is not a sign of how great you are within; in fact, he writes, that each person with their unique gift was imperative to the work of Christ and to the church as a whole.  He concludes by saying, “But earnestly desire the greater gifts- And I show you a still more excellent way.”  (12:31)

And what is that most excellent way?  Paul makes it abundantly clear: Love.  He begins 13 with three very direct statements concerning works and gifts: “If I speak with tongues of men and angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or clanging cymbal.  If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.  And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.”

This is the first and most basic understanding of love.  Righteousness is not being able to do wonderful things.  Look at some of the things that Paul points out- “If I can speak with tongues of men and angels”- does it really matter if I have the most eloquent of speech?  Does it matter if I can hold the attention of thousands, if I can speak with the proverbial golden tongue if love is devoid of my speech? No; for without love, I am in the end only muttering useless sounds that are unintelligible to the soul.  He goes on to state that having all knowledge, having understanding of mysteries, gifts of prophecy or great faith- are useless knowledge and useless faith without love.  In fact he very directly says having these gifts without love reduces him to nothing!  And he wraps up this section by saying that though he make great sacrifice in his life, if not done in love, it profits him absolutely nothing.  So then, the question must be asked- if these things practiced on their own merit are useless, what then is love?  If love is the key, what is it?  And of greater importance, what impact can love- when understood in it’s true concept- have on this world of hate in which we live?

We are most fortunate that Paul must have anticipated this question to be asked for centuries to come.  He takes the remaining time in chapter 13 to help us have complete understanding of this most sacred word.  He breaks it down as such: 7 examples of what love is, and 8 examples of what love is not.  While this explanation is helpful to us, it also served a secondary purpose.  As John Calvin stated, “I have also no doubt that he designed indirectly to reprove the Corinthians, by setting before them a contrast, in which they might recognize, by way of contraries, their own vices.”

So let us first take a look at the 8 things Paul identifies as the opposite of love:  1. Not jealous 2. Does not brag 3. Is not arrogant 4. Does not act unbecomingly 5. Does not seek its own 6. Is not provoked 7. Does not take account of wrong 8. Does not rejoice in unrighteousness.  Some of these should be pretty self explanatory; however, let us take a brief moment to look a little deeper.

The first, that love lacks jealousy, speaks to the reality that you cannot look at what another has and covet it.  How can you love that person if you cannot take your mind off what they own?  If you feel that what God has gifted them belongs more rightfully to you, then you are exalting yourself above them.  In a more intimate relationship, jealousy can look different- behaving as a territorial primate, demanding to control their every move.  This also does not show forth love, for in a figurative sense, you have caged them and attempt to control their freedom.  This is not something love would do.

In the same respect, love does not brag and is not arrogant, nor does it seek its own.  These three go together, as they both- once again- involve exalting self.  As long as you are your main focus in the relationship, love will be absent.  For how can you attend to the need of another if you are constantly looking out for your own?  How can you love a person whom you constantly belittle or degrade, either through word or action?

Love does not act unbecomingly, Calvin again refers to this as acting ostentatious- which means a vulgar display intended to impress or attract notice.  Once again, this is an action solely on yourself.  Perhaps once again, Paul may have been thinking about relationships in the Body of Christ, as the Corinthians were struggling with spiritually vulgar actions meant to draw attention to themselves…  But I digress.

Finally, love does not take account of wrong, is not easily provoked and does not rejoice in unrighteousness…  I think the main overall thought is, that once again, love puts our feelings aside for the greater good of the relationship.  Rather than focus on the negative, love lets go for the sake of peace.  My feelings are sacrificed for the sake of love, expecting nothing in return.

Paul counters with a good description of what love is.  After very vividly painting that love of self is the opposite of love for others, he shows us clearly the lesson we must learn if we are to survive, not only as a culture, but as the Body of Christ.  Love is patient, love is kind- when we deal with others, our compassion must shine through! Love rejoices in truth- for even though truth may hurt, lies and deception are much more destructive.  Love bears and endures all things- right or wrong, good or bad, love will carry the burden through to the end- as our wedding vows say, til death do us part.  Love believes all things, love hopes all things…  Paul is essentially writing that no matter how dark, love never gives up.  It presses forth, holding fast to hope above all.

Paul then ends the section by stating that love never fails.  This is why Paul said it is a much more excellent way.  Because every other gift given, whether tongues or healing or prophecy- these things are not eternal.  These things will fade.  These things will come to an end.  Material possessions and gifts will blow away like the wind.  But love- love is eternal. Love can never fail.  Love never ceases.  Love never ends.

The gifts that the Corinthians seem so enamored with, are likened unto things needed for our spiritual immaturity.  They are the gifts of spiritual children.  We see the mysteries of God through a dim glass, but when they have fallen away, and only love is left behind- when we enter eternity with no need of tongues and prophecies- then we will see clearly.  Then we will have reached our full spiritual maturity.  It is what we should strive for.  It is what should be our motivation.  It should be the one action (for love is not a feeling, but a verb) that we stress more than any other when dealing with our brothers and sisters in Christ- and with the lost. 

Love is, the more excellent way.

And I Love The Bitterness- Thanksgiving Thoughts

Thanksgiving.  Turkey day.  Day of national pride and honor, day of being thankful for all the blessings, thankful for all things bright and beautiful.  Yes, it is that time of year again.  To be honost  I do like this particular holiday.  I love the food- though I must admit I would rather see beef briscuit on the table than turkey.  Or a hamburger...  mmm yes, piled high with lettuce, tomatoe, onion, mushroom, jalapeno...  Can't go wrong anytime you serve that...  But food aside, it is nice to have a day set aside to thank God for all blessings great and small.

All month I have been watching and listening as people count down the days to this most sacred of holidays, recalling what is precious to them.  I have seen people move about, expressing thanks from their lips for everything from children to spouses, parents to siblings, houses, jobs and cars, and oh the list carries on...  But there has been one thing suspicously absent from all.  Well, several things actually, but for sake of easy reading and easier typing, I shall sum all of it up in one word: bitterness.

Allow me to explain what I am meaning, before I am cast off as a heathen and a hater.  Let me start off with something simple.  Joy.  True joy.  I assume that we have all felt it, some level of it anyway.  But can you truly and fully appreciate joy- without knowing sorrow?  What about gain- we all have gained something we appreciate, yes?  But what level of happiness does gain bring unless we have also experienced loss?  Do we understand freedom without slavery, or liberty without tyranny?  Can there be a winner without a loser?  Is it not true that everyone is a friend, and thus friendships are devalued, unless we have dealt with enemies?   Can we know the depths of love, can we understand it's impact on our lives without also having experienced hate?   

And speaking of love- would we ever, even just once, experience the healing power it holds- if we are never broken?

My friends- can we know just how sweet life is without knowing life's bitterness?

The reality is, without bitterness, the rest of life would blend together.  It would be one endless blah, with every emotion the same as the next, our senses dulled, and we would be left with the inability to comprehend the very emotions we crave.  Love, joy, peace, all would be as common to us as a glass of water or a handful of dirt.  I dare say, that without bitterness, we would still be broken, lost souls in need of a Savior- but never understanding why.  I don't think I would ever want to be in that state of mind...

So while it is true, this great turkey day I will be thanking God for all He has done for me, I will be grateful for the love, joy, peace, happiness... 

But I will also take a moment and thank God for the bitterness...  because what would life be without it?

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone- and may God bless you in all things bright and beautiful- and may He bless you in the bitterness!

Mission Minded in America

WE ARE a Christian nation.  I hear this repeatedly.  It seems to be the mantra of most followers of Christ here in America, a mantra that seems cemented by the fact that most of the founders of this great land professed to be followers of the faith; it flows through the veins of our history; it is even reflected in our national motto:  In God We Trust.  Yes, it seems that everyone knows we are a Christian nation; especially the Christians.

This is both a blessing and a curse.  It is a blessing because it means that we enjoy a rich heritage of religious freedom.  As Christians we are sensitive to any attacks against that freedom that come our way; and even when we may not always be overly active in politics, we are quick to step up and speak out when religious liberty is threatened.  However, it is also a curse.  How so you say?  Allow me to explain...

American Christians are great at evangelizing- in other nations.  We are quick to run to other nations to spread the Gospel; and often when our missionaries go overseas they see great results- God moving in amazing ways, spreading revival throughout communities the missionaries work in, many people converting to become followers of Christ.  I will be the first to admit it is very exciting to hear the testimonies that missionaries have to share when they return from foreign soil.

However, we are not so quick to share the Gospel here.  It seems too often our mouths are more interested in praising our favorite sports team than we are praising God.  Our heart is more content seeking the American dream than seeking to fulfil the Great Commission.  We are more cautious with our words, which are chosen intentionally to ensure they do not offend those in this vast culture that may believe in something different.

And we have our excuses; sometimes they even sound good.  The one on my mind tonight though, is the following:  We are a Christian nation.  So perhaps I am missing something here...  Because we are a Christian nation, we as Christians are excused from sharing the Gospel here?  It saddens me to no end when people tell me this...  You see, in the mind of many Christians, so much of our culture revolves around Christianity that they really believe everyone here has already heard the good news...  There is no point in making a special effort, in living mission minded in this land- because everyone has heard it already, and they have either chosen to accept or reject it.

You may ask- why does this sadden you?  Isn't it true?  In this nation where Jesus is so prevalent that His name is even a common curse word, shouldn't we turn more attention to other lands and not be so concerned about it here?  After all, we will probably just offend others anyway, and then we will be labeled as self-righteous people who are just some weird kind of zealot...

Well?  Is it true?

Tonight I had the opportunity to speak with a couple of teenagers about Jesus Christ.  I asked them who they thought He was.  Their response?  He was a guy who taught some religious stuff.  I asked them if they knew what sin was.  Would you believe they didn't?  They genuinely did not know what it meant to be a sinner!!  It was a great joy that God allowed me to explain the Gospel to them-  it is with greater joy that I have a new brother and sister in Christ when all was said and done...  But the reason and purpose for this blog is not to shine a light on that, but rather on this fact:  So many of us assume that everyone in America has heard the Gospel, that everyone knows what sin is, that everyone knows who Jesus is; we become so convinced of this that we make little or no effort to evangelize our neighbors, our co-workers, or families, our friends, or whoever else God places in our path...

The fact is, there are a lot of Americans that we have placed labels and assumptions on, who don't fit in to it at all.  The reality is that this society is so exposed to the Gospel that many of the lost have become desensitized to it's message, never getting the whole of the truth.  The reality is that too often we replace genuine evangelism with bumper sticker and t-shirt slogans, giving out only a half-hearted morsel of the whole loaf of the bread of life. 

The reality is, here in America, Jesus' Words apply greatly :  "The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few."

May I ask a question?  When was the last time you shared the Gospel with someone?  When was the last time you took a friend or co-worker aside and said, "can I tell you about Someone who has completely changed my life?"  When was the last time you saw someone hurting and you offered to pray for them- not just when you got home or when you remembered to, but stopped right there, stopped what you were doing, and prayed WITH them?  When was the last time you were intentional about being mission minded here in America? 

I must confess- too often I am not.  It grieves me to think of missed opportunities because I fell into the trap of believing "they have probably already heard it"... 

Jesus never said, "Go-unless you think they already know."

Does that mean every time we share people will choose to accept Christ right then and there?  No.  Jesus was clear that many will reject Him, few will follow.  But you see that part isn't up to us.  It isn't for us to make the decision for them, and it isn't for us to get discouraged and give up when they don't.  What is for us is to be obedient.  And what is for us is that when we are obedient, we will see God move!  You see, I really believe Jesus' Words, the harvest IS plentiful here in America!  There are so many that have yet to hear the truth in our own backyard! 

Do me a favor would ya?  Let's agree together to be intentionally mission minded in THIS Country, in OUR state, in OUR city, in OUR neighborhood- you and me!  What do you say? 

I believe God will move and use us in an extraordinary way if we will commit to that!  Let's be a part of His harvest here in America!

America Again

I HAVE TO BE HONEST...

Gov. Rick Perry was my first choice for the republican nominee for president in 2012.  That guy, in my humble opinion, is a rock star governor not afraid to live his faith.  But... sadly he was defeated rather quickly and quite handily.  SO... My second choice was Michelle Bauchman.  I love that woman; she is not afraid to say what needs to be said when it should be said...  Sadly, she was also defeated rather quikly.  Well, you know what they say- the third time's a charm, so I went with Sen. Rick Santorum...  only to be disappointed at his lack of finishing big.  well, I guess he did come in second...

One thing is for certain, my very last choice was Mitt Romney.  A guy who came across as a moderate establishment candidate.  A guy who was carrying an awful big chain around his neck with bling attached to it that plainly read "Romneycare" in the gold glittery letters.  A guy who was the poster child for the evil "one percent" that the left was going nutso about.  Yeah... that guy.  I hate to say, but I was more excited to bob for dead fish in a barrel than to vote for Romney.

I was firm in my convictions, refusing to acknowledge him as a viable candidate.  When it became clear that he would be our nominee I entered a state of political depression, preparing my mind for another Obama victory.  Visions of the end of America floated through my head.  I was beginning to accept the premise of doom.

You see, I understand that the America I grew up with, the America that I had known and loved since I was a small child, is in critical condition.  She is laying in the ICU room for nations, on life support.  The prognosis is dim.  Hope is not lost- but those with any logic know it might as well be.  Her light is fading from her eyes, and her torch is but an ember.  She has been beaten down by an administration that promised hope and change, and instead gave us no hope and a beating with chains.  That once great Lady Liberty, crippled at the hands of her leader.  Her people made to believe that American exceptionalism was a demonic plague.  Her people assured that to believe in America as the last great hope, that city on a hill for all other nations to look to, was nothing more than a corrupt dream worthy of being abandoned on the trash heap of unfairness.  No, we were told, it is time to look beyond what was and accept a new reality- that America needs to be brought to her knees, brought to a place where all the other nations can see eye to eye with her.  Eye to eye, that is, as she looks up- at them.

That America, that once was great, that was the beacon of hope to all the world, had had it's beacon of hope extinguished by a leader who promised hope.  Oh, how I look back to my youth, back to the America I grew up in, longing for her to pull through, to stand back up lifting high the notion that ALL men are created equal, that ALL men have the right to life and liberty, that ALL men can be free to pursue their dreams and reach as far as they are able, that ALL men through hard work, blood, sweat and tears can one day reach their dreams- and more importantly, that they can impact their neighborhood, their city, their state, their country, their world- that we are more than just a number, a nameless peasant...

I WANT that America back.

I WANT a better future for my children and grandchildren.

But I don't see that.  I don't see anything but Lady Liberty taking her last dying breath under this administration.

That is where I was.  That is what I saw.  I had no faith in the possibility of a victory for conservatism. 

But then...  I watched something unfold.  It was called hope.  Not a glittery hope, not honey-like words spoken from the lips of a seducer in chief.  No, there was something else here.  It was hope spoken from a man once held in sway by the liberal left.  It was hope spoken from a woman reflecting on being that little girl refused hamburgers at the local gathering because of her skin color, later elevated to Secretary of State.  It was hope spoken from a man whose family immigrated from communist Cuba, whose father and mother poured sweat- not for their dreams, but for the dreams of their son.  It was hope spoken from a man who assured us that it is ok- no, not just ok but the right thing to do to believe in America again!

The reminder that WE are the employers, and that this president has been no more effective than an empty chair flooded through my mind- and I pray yours.  The reminder that THIS president, who PROMISED to slow the rise of the waters and to heal the lands SADLY FORGOT the millions of Americans without work, without food, losing homes, losing dreams, losing the very hope that they were promised.  Most importantly, we were reminded that IT IS NEVER too late to HOPE for TRUE HOPE.  It is never too late for Lady Liberty to rise up again.  It is NEVER TOO LATE for OUR America to stand up and once again be that beacon of hope, that symbol of liberty that shines forth from sea to shining sea!

YES!  America can be restored!  There IS hope!  Where there is truth, there is hope! Where there is faith, there can be victory!  Where there are people who are willing to stand and fight for her, there is liberty! 

My friends, NOW is our time.  They had their time, those who would see America weak and defeated.  But NOW is OUR time to rise!  NOW is our time to say, that we are TIRED of more people out of work, we are TIRED of more people hurting, we are TIRED of more debt, we are TIRED of the right to life being trampled, we are TIRED of the right to liberty being stolen, and we are TIRED of a government that has gone TOO FAR!

Four years ago, God gace us the exact leader we asked for.  But now it is time that we recognize our wrongs.  Now is the time we get down on our knees, and go to Almighty God, admitting that we were wrong.  Now is the time that we seek His help once again, then rise to our feet, and claim the idea of America, the idea of freedom, the idea of liberty that burns in our minds, our hearts, our souls again!!!  LET US go forth from this day forward and fire those responsible for trashing our Constitution, fire those who have attempted to enslave us to their socialist views, and TAKE AMERICA BACK FROM THEIR HANDS AND BACK IN THE HANDS OF THEIR EMPLOYERS- WE! THE! PEOPLE!!!!

What do you say?  Are you willing to stand?  Are you willing to be a voice of reason in this time of insanity?  Because my friends, the time is now, you are the voice that will restore hope, and your voice was never more needed than NOW!!!

My Destiny, Part Three: Rebirth

...until out of the corner of my eye I see- a light.  Just a tiny hole poking through the darkness at first.  But within mere moments I not only see, but am enveloped completely by it, overwhelmed by it.  There is not even the smallest trace of darkness anymore.  It has vanished so quickly that for a moment I wonder if it was even here.  And then it is but a fading memory...

A breeze passes over me, and suddenly I feel lifted with new strength.  It is not my own, no mistaking that.  My body still feels as though it is made of sand, inconsistant with no ability to hold structure on it's own.  Yet this strength holds me together, lifting me to my feet.  New found freedom washes over me.  Love infuses me.  Life takes hold of me.  Life... 

It is then that I notice something laying at my feet.  I look down and find a shell where only minutes ago I lay broken.  It looks like me...  Or, what was me.  The twisted form of myself that had become gnarled from disease.  Is it any wonder I could even move, I ask myself?  Or were my previous movements just an illusion from the mind of a paralyzed man?  What exactly is happening to me?

It is then that I see a lamb, as though it had been slain, yet living in all might and power.  It is the very God I had cried out to, the very God whom seemed so very far away, standing not above me, but beside me, holding me up.  It is then I realize that this new strength is His.  He has taken the darkness from me.  I do not have to ask, for the answer is already there- it was He who paid the price for my life.  He had ransomed me with His very blood.  Then in His power, He took my old self, that broken blackened creature of the night that I was, and changed it. 

I am a new creation.

This is my destiny.

I have done many wrongs, hurt God and others, in a life that was a suicide mission.  But no more.  Now God has set me on a new path; a path of peace though we are in a war, a path of love though we are surrounded by hate, a path of hope despite being surrounded by hopelessness.  This is the great adventure.   I do not know what lies ahead of my feet.  I am so blinded by the Light that it is all I can see- but it is that the Light, the Light of Christ, that I shall follow- no matter where it leads. 

I am redeemed. 

I am restored.

I am reborn.

The Lord Jesus Christ has came to my aid.  The Son of God has taken my place in judgement where I should have stood.  He saw my frailty, my weakness, my disease.  When all others cringed from me, when all others ran from me, when there was no hope in any other name under Heaven- he ran to me, and purchased the rights to my soul with His very blood.  He resurrected my dead soul just as He was resurrected from the grave.  He is the Light that I will follow until the end of eternity- and beyond.

This has been my story, from beginning to end.  Sometimes I forget myself, and I look back for that shell of a creature I once was.  But I never can see it.  Oh yes, sometimes my eyes do start to adjust to the darkness again.  But they never fully adjust, and I stumble and fall to my knees where the Lamb lifts me up and surrounds me with His love and His light again. 

Yes, this has been my story.  But my question to you is, is it not your story too?  For my brothers and sisters in Christ, do you remember the time when He came to your rescue?  Or have you forgotten the joy His love brings?  Stop looking back at your past.  Turn yourself back around, focus only on Him.  Your past is dead and gone, a distant memory cast into the sea of forgetfulness, cast as far from you as the east is from the west.  It is forgotten by God...  Why don't you forget it too?

As for those of you who may read this, who are still in that miry pit...  There is only one way out my friend.  There is only one way to freedom.  You can remain in that pit, broken, twisted, dying...  But there is another destiny that awaits.  A destiny not of regret, not of hopelessness, not of hate.  It is a destiny of peace, love, hope, redemption... 

Your adventure awaits...

Well?  What are you waiting for?

My Destiny, Part Two: 1000 Apologies

...And it is in this darkness that I somehow muster the strength for a feeble cry... it barely escapes my lips, the smallest of voices in my mind and ears...  and yet it echoes in the darkness, as if off of unseen walls in the black, growing louder, louder still until it becomes deafening... help!  I cry, as I realize I can no longer move on my own.  My spiritual state has struck me down, a sword to the heart, and left me for dead.  But somehow I still manage breath.  I choke out the whispered apologies... 

I have so many to make.  I have wasted so much time, precious time given by God...  I have committed spiritual treason against myself, my family, my friends...  Despite my own efforts, despite my own thoughts of myself I have become the hypocrite, the pharisee, the whitewashed tomb full of dead men's bones...  So many apologies...  Where to begin?

Where do you begin when you have 1000 apologies to make, apologies that are just words, that can never change the past, that can never mend the damage done, that can never erase the scars...  Scars given to others, and to myself.  If words can never hurt- then they can never heal.  They are just empty expressions, void of meaning.  Yet these empty expressions are all I have left in me.  It is all my strength to put down my pride and admit I was wrong.  It takes every muscle in my body to form the words, I repent.  I commission these words with prayer, hoping that He will give meaning to the only thing I have left to give.

My reality lies in the fact that I cannot escape my destiny in my own strength.  My reality is that I cannot rescue myself.  As my life plays out before me, my reality is that it was not I that ever did anything good... nor was it I that had the strength to whisper my apologies, my repentance.

Repentance...  Is it real?  Do I have any capability to turn from this disease infected self that I am?  Do I have any capability to not just apologize but to make a lifestyle change so radical that it is though I am a new creation?  Will my apologies, barren and empty yet from the depths of my soul, will they mean anything?

All I can do is ponder these questions.  They echo through my skull, driving me mad with hopelessness, until out of the corner of my eye I see...

...to be continued...

My Destiny, Part One: Godforsaken by Law

I HAVE been called many things in my life.  There is no denying that.  Some has been justified, some- not so much.  Some has been hurtful, some- not so much.  I have been called hateful; and I have been called too loving.  I have been accused of being a mocker of God's Word; and I have been called someone who takes God's Word too seriously.  I have been called someone who caused division because I don't always agree with people; and I have been called a person who tries too hard to bring people together.  I have been labeled a hypocrite; and I have been hailed as a saint...  OK, maybe not literally on that last part, but you get the idea... :)

Yes, I have been called many things, have been many faces to many people...  But the real question is what am I when all the masks break away, when the different perceptions are gone, when I am stripped bare to face the throne of God...  When I am face down to the King of Kings, about to be judged by His law...

By His law...  I am someone who has held other gods- including myself- before Him.  I am an idolator.  I have taken His Name in vain, both literrally and figuratively.  I have mocked Him and His Word.  Instead of being at rest and peace with Him, I have waged war against Him in my heart.  I have disrespected my parents- indeed, the very gift of life itself.  I have hated my brother, secretly killing him in my heart.  I have lusted...  the very sin of adultery in the shadows of my mind.  I have stolen!  Things that were never meant to be mine, clutched tightly in my hands...  I have lied about my neighbor... and my neighbor's neighbor...  And the guy down the street...  And the girl 4 houses over...  Oh the stories I have told about them...  And why not?  After all, THEY get all the good stuff- the nice car that should be mine; the huge house that I should be living in... 

Hypocrite.

I admit it.

By His law, His holy Word, all of my good is stripped bare.  I am exposed before Him and before all for what I am.  I am an unclean thing.  ALL of my righteousness is as filthy rags.  I am dirty, disgusting, grimy, putrid.  What is there in me to be proud of?  What good in my life can I point to?  What love in my life, what light in my soul?

I am hypocrite.  Nothing more, nothing less.  All of those hurtful things that have been spoken of me... are all true.  I cannot deny them.  Every accusation- though I would flee from them, to run away and burrow away hiding from them, they hunt me down and devour me because they are truth.

I am nothing.  There is no good, no lovely thing about me.

I am Godforsaken, for He cannot look upon sin- and I am sin.

Now that the mask has deteriorated into dust I see for myself who I am.  How I long to be able to go back in time, to change choices I have made, to undo wrongs and make them right... 

But it is like the poet once said,

"I made a choice that I regret,
Now what I see is what I get
It's too late to look back
I've got no way to switchback."

No way to switchback.  No way to undo.  No way no how no help.  The only thing before me now is to face what I have become, to face this unmasked creature from within, to take the sword and slay the dragon that I have allowed to consume my soul!  But... there is just one problem.  I do not have the strength of one man, let alone ten thousand.  My attempt to reach for a sword falls flat; I cannot even lift a finger.  This new sight has caused me to collapse as though dead on the ground, to be surrounded by darkness. 

And it is in this darkness that I...


...to be continued...

Attack of the 50 Foot Chicken Sandwich

I sit quietly at my table, preparing to eat my tasty dinner.  I have been ready to eat for some time, and my stomach reminds me that I have allowed too much time between meals.  I open the wrapper and inhale the delicous scent of the chicken sandwich.  My mouth waters. But then, much to my surprise, the chicken patty comes to life and begins screaming hateful slurs at me.  It picks up a sign that clearly states "I hate gays!" in bold print, waving it defiently in my face.  To top it all off, the chicken then grabs a pickle from the now barren bun and flings it in my face.  I sit back astonished, stunned, horrified.  All I can think is- I should have known.  I should have known!  Eating here, at Chik-Fil-A, was a huge mistake.  After all, the owner is nothing but a hateful bigot.  I heard it myself!  The news told me all about his "comments", and I use that term loosely.  They were nothing but pure hate...

Or were they?

While it is true that the chicken sandwich did not really attack me, what is true is this:  My exageration of my lunchtime adventure was as ridiculous as the exageration of what the Chik-Fil-A controversy is.  Let us examine what the company president Dan Cathy actually said: "We are very much supportive of the family — the biblical definition of the family unit. We are a family-owned business, a family-led business, and we are married to our first wives. We give God thanks for that."  It is that quote, that statement and that statement ALONE, that has erupted into a national firestorm controversy.  It is those words that has caused celebrities to publicly decry the chicken specialists, and has spurred mayors to refuse business licenses to the popular franchise.  But look carefully- there are no hate filled slurs.  There is no bigotry.  Just a comment that Chik-Fil-A supports the traditional Biblical definition of marriage.  Not once did he say, "I hate gays".  No where in there are the words "gays aren't human" or "kill the gays".  Not even a word against homosexuality.  In fact, notice what he DIDN'T say- he didn't say homosexuality was wrong.  He didn't say homosexuals were evil.  He didn't say anything against them- just that, as a company, they support traditional family marriage.

 So the question, then, is not- why did he make hateful comments; rather, why is there such a reaction to it?  Millions of Americans feel the same way that Mr. Cathy feel.  The truth is, there is such strong support for traditional, heterosexual marriage that whenever the legalization of homosexual marriage is put on a ballot the American people ALWAYS vote to keep it between one man and one woman.  So if Mr. Cathy is, in fact, on the same level of thinking as most Americans- we must ask again, what is the real issue here?

I think that we need to come to an understanding.  We need to realize this very basic point: it is not, and never has been, about marriage.  Oh sure there are a few homosexuals here and there that really believe the debate is all about whether or not they can marry someone that has all the same body parts that they do.  But reality speaks when we listen, and the movement as a whole has nothing to do with wedlock.  What it does deal with is acceptance.  The real agenda is making sure that everyone- and I mean, everyone- accepts them, coddles them, condones their every choice.  It is not who can marry who, but who will accept their choice as normal.  The idea that some members of society still believe that their choice is a sin and not to be condoned or accepted as "o.k." is a very loathsome idea indeed, and those ideas of sin must be stomped out. 

No, my friend- it is not about whether or not Steve can wear a wedding dress or Mary a tux on their wedding day.  It is all about whether or not the good reverend can stand in a pulpit and declare homosexuality a sin.  It makes them uncomfortable to think that some believe God will not accept them into heaven unless they repent!  And at the end of the day we must realize that we will all eventually be required to take a side on this issue.  If we stay back now, cowering under a banner of false love, we are only prolonging the inevitable; for the fight will eventually come to us.  They will make sure to bring it.  And for the record, I say false love because true love speaks truth; even when it is unpopular.

Of course, Chik-Fil-A wandered in to this controversy like a chicken to the slaughter.  But not like any chicken, mind you.  No, more like a brave chicken, willing to challenge the farmer's axe.  For that, they deserve much credit.  They not only believe in traditional marriage, they hold strong to their convictions, despite the protests, despite the slander, despite every evil word that has been uttered against them- they have not bowed down to the idol of tolerance.  They have issued no apology, no hasty press release saying "we didn't mean that".  Despite the attack on their first ammendment right of free speech, they have not wavered in what they said.

It is with this, these final words I must relate to you- that I gladly stand in support of Chik-Fil-A.  I am proud to call Mr. Cathy my brother in Christ.  It is with their example, that I can look and say there is still courage in the American church, still strength to be willing to do what is right.  Thank you Chik-Fil-A for being an inspiration, a hope, a reflection of truth- and the love of God- in this dark society.

Love Your Brother, Hate Your Brother

So yesterday evening I was walking with my wife in downtown Nampa, having a nice stroll when we came across the Blue Eye tavern...  now there are two realities here; first, the blue eye is a creepy place.  Not a place we visit, just one we hope would close down.  Second, we have a tendancy to attract strange people...  It is almost like they flock to us...  Case in point- a strange lady came up to us, this older asian woman with long black hair- and a white stripe dyed down the center of said hair, giving the illusion that she was wearing the scalp of a skunk on her head. 

So she comes up to us and whispers, "come here" and motions us about 2 feet away from the door of the blue eye.  Then looking around, in a hushed voice, says- "I just want to ask you if the blue eye is open..."  She then continues talking all about how great the club is...  Keep in mind she has to be in her late 50's, so that adds to the bizarness of the situation...

While she was a little strange, the thing is, when we are out we encounter a lot of strange people.  But sometimes they are strange people- in the Body.  People who are fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, who just seem a little on the odd side.  Yes, I know that I am odd, but I am talking a different kind of odd. 

Then there is the other type of odd... the type that drives you crazy...  the type that even make you mad...  Have you ever experienced that?  I know I have.  Now understand, it takes a lot to make me mad.  But sometimes you meet those people that are like a thorn in your side.  There is just something about them that grates on your nerves...  Like fingernails across a chalkboard... (shudders)

I think that we need to come to an understanding.  Sometimes people make us mad; and that is ok.  It is ok to not always get along.  It is ok to have differences of opinion.  It is ok even to get in arguements sometimes.  But what is NOT ok is letting those differences breed hate.  The apostle John  writes in 1 John 2 that if we hate our brother, we do not walk in the light of Christ but rather are blinded by darkness.  This is a very serious warning he issues us...  And we must be careful to guard our heart against hate.

"But I don't hate, I wouldn't hate anyone!" you say.  Maybe so- but then, often times hate sneaks in unexpected.  Like an unseen enemy it grips our heart, and often we do not see it until it has consumed us.  How do we stop such an enemy before it takes hold?  How do we combat such a powerful foe?

The first and most important step is communication.  When our brothers and sisters anger us, we must communicate it with God.  We must take it to Him in prayer, with a humble heart.  Then we must do the hard thing- we must be willing to take it to our brother or sister.  We must not hold on to it!  If we do not let it go then we will only end up giving in- to hate.

The question becomes then, why do we insist on holding on to our anger when our focus should be on the real enemy?  We must take every effort to put our differences aside, taking down walls of difference- even walls of anger- and allow wounds to heal.  We must join together as the Body, working as the Body in order to reach the world around us. 

Do you have anger or hate in your heart for a brother or sister?  It is time to put it down.  It is time we fight to win- and fight we must, by waging war against angry division.  End the hate. Pray to god. Love your brother.

Rising From The Ashes of A Dark Night

As a woman lies in the hospital in critical condition, begging for her 6 year old little girl that was killed, I must be honest- I had been looking forward to this weekend for well over a year.  Even as the man learns his son is one of the dead, bringing forth that age old saying that a parent should never have to bury their own child, I must confess that I was filled with excitement leading up to this past weekend.  And as a father lay dead on a theater floor, his 2 sons alive but heartbroken, I had been thrilled at the idea of taking my own son to The Dark Knight Rises- what I believed would be the best movie of this year..

I don't know about the best movie...  I haven't the heart to go see it yet.  But I guess you could say it is the most tragic movie of the year.  What human with a heart is not moved to tears at the horror that unfolded early Friday morning at the movies in Aurora Colorado?   One man- one evil man- shooting and injuring up to 71 people, killing 12 of them.  12 people dead, from 6 to almost 60.  A man dressed, ironically, like the main villain of this last Batman movie. 

Those who left the theater among the living must be thinking, why am I still alive...  While those that were killed have families asking, why were they killed.  And those of us who were outsiders to this story are left asking- why did it happen in the first place?

As I ponder this thought, I am reminded of a scene from the previous Batman movie: The Dark Knight.  If you will, recall with me, when Bruce Wayne and his loyal butler Alfred were discussing the possible motives of the madman known as the joker.  Wayne was having difficulty wrapping his mind around the joker's actions, which appeared to be for anything but money, power or fame...  In wisdom, Alfred commented that sometimes the wicked do what they do for no other reason other than, they are just evil.  I think it would be fair to say, that the writers unknowingly gave us insight into this man's actions Friday morning...  Perhaps his motivation, his driving force was nothing more than- he is evil.  The truth is the easiest explanation- we are all born sinners; but some embrace the darkness much more than others...

I will not take the step, as some have, to use this time of great sadness to push a political point or theory.  There are discussions to be had, to ask what could have been done differently, to ask what can we as citizens do to try and avert such crime from happening again.  We must investigate further, pursuing truth in this case, willing to explore the possibility he was not working alone, and we must turn over the rock and see if there is more danger lurking.  Those discussions are fair and should be held.  But what must not be done, on either side of the political aisle, is to use this as a weapon or tool to push an agenda.  This man has already unleashed enough firepower on us; let us not take up his torment and fire it upon ourselves or our neighbor.  No; the time of playing off the pain of victims is something we must elevate ourselves above- lest we become as much a monster as the man responsible.  It is sick and wrong to take advantage of such loss of life...

What must be done instead, is to look at the frailty of life.  To accept the truth that we are not immortal.  To understand that we have such a short time on this planet.  Whether it be 1 or 100 years we are given, the reality is we just don't know when we take that last breath.  The words of one victim should ring ever true in our hearts and minds- "I was shown how fragile life was... I saw the terror on bystanders' faces. I saw the victims of a senseless crime. I saw lives change. I was reminded that we don't know when or where our time on Earth will end. When or where we will breathe our last breath," said  Jessica Ghawi, after surviving a mass shooting at a Toronto shopping mall- before she was killed, this time in the Colorado shootings. 

We must take advantage of the time given us.  We must make the most of our lives.  We must not waste it.  There is one message, one recurring theme portrayed in the character of Batman; that tragedy can turn into triumph.  We can overcome the evil that drives men like Mr. Holmes. We can learn that if we can endure the pain and accept God's healing hand upon our heart, we can become better, stronger, wiser.  If we will hold on to it, we can rest assured that when it seems we are in the darkest night of our lives, hope is not lost; for we can turn to the One who is Hope incarnate.

My dear friends, as the weekend now turns into the week, as we move forward in our lives, I ask this one simple request.  Do not go unchanged, unmoved by the tragedy of this past weekend.  I know that most who read this will not have been personnally affected by this- but I pray you will be mentally and spiritually affected.  I pray that you will move forward, never taking life or your loved ones for granted.  Hold your loved ones closer than you ever have before.  Make each moment of your life count.  Do not waste it but use it for the purpose that God has given to you.  Most importantly, remember- when the darkness closes in and is suffocating to your soul- remember that hope is not lost, if you would just reach out for it.  Seek hope always, my friends.  It can only be truly found at the foot of the cross, at the empty tomb, in the mercy of Christ the Messiah- but if we hold to that hope, then we WILL overcome the night- and we shall rise from the ashes, rise from the tragedies, rise from whatever comes our way to destroy us.  We will rise!

The Salt of the Earth

I hate it.  I absolutely despise it.  Blech.  It tastes nasty, it is grainy, it dries out my mouth...  Nope, salt is not for me.  I don't add salt to anything I eat; I avoid it at all cost.  But there is something about it that, despite my feelings, is necessary.  The very nature of our body was created to be in need of a certain amount of the nasty stuff.  On top of that it has for thousands of years been a flavor enhancer, but more importantly, a preservative.  Not one that I would have personally picked, but- I digress.

Preservative...  salt...  It reminds me of something Jesus once said: "Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men."  Matthew 5:13

 Have you ever wondered what that means?  What was Jesus referring to when He said that we are the salt of the earth?  And why would He choose salt? Blech...  But then, realize that when He spoke every Word had meaning, and a much deeper one than what we see on the surface.  We are the salt of the earth...  But if the salt has lost his savour...

Going back to my original thought, the idea that salt not only gives flavor but is a preservative...  What is a preservative? It is something that we add to a food item in order to make the said food last longer.  Food without it will spoil faster.  So we add the stuff in an effort to make it last as long as humanly possible.  Add that concept into the idea that we are the salt- or preservative- of the world.  What do you think that means?  How does salt get used?  It has to actually be applied, right?  And when it is applied it is done liberally, and with hope- hope that it will have some lasting effect, that it will make a difference. 

As Christians, we must ask ourselves this question- are we fulfilling our role?  Are we allowing ourselves to be used in hope to preserve the earth as best we can until He returns?  Now before you think I have gone on some enviro-friendly trip, let me assure you that is not what I am talking about.  Let me explain:  We all know this earth is a rotten place to live.  Everything seems to be falling apart right before our eyes; and each generation things get worse and worse.  We also know from Scripture that it won't be too long before the final prophecies are fulfilled- the end times are, indeed, just around the corner...  But what are we to do in the meantime?  Are we to just sit on our couches at home?  Are we to go on with our lives, steadily plodding towards the finish line without a care in the world?  Is that what a preservative does?  God forbid it!  We are the salt of the earth!  We are to go out in hope that God will use our talents, that He will use us to preserve the earth as best we can until His return!  That means preaching the Word, the good news of the Gospel which is our flavor; it means standing for what is right; it means hoping for a move of God that will shake foundations and bring people to their knees in repentance!!! To do anything less is to be fulfilling the exact opposite of our role! 

But we must also understand something else.  A single grain of salt will not do much to preserve or flavor.  When we separate ourselves apart, when we build walls that divide us, we are not very effective.  Listen carefully to this: YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY GRAIN OF SALT!!!  We have bought into this idea that we must have these walls built up around us, around our churches, around our denominations.  We have bought into a philosophy that says that we cannot work with someone who goes to the church down the road.  We have walled around our ground, staked our claim, raised our flag and sounded the alarm- against each other!    And while we sit in our bunkers, hiding our face from other believers who don't look, talk, walk or sound like us, the world rots around us, a lack of preservative whithering it away...

Now understand, the salt must remain pure- false teachers and false prophets will arise in attempt to deceive.  But I am not talking about that here.  I am talking about brothers and sisters in the faith, members of the same Body of Christ who would rather cut each other from the Body than work in effort to make a true difference in this land.  But what would happen if we took down these walls?  What if instead of refusing to work together, we instead stood side by side, building each other up, praying for each other, supporting each other?  What would happen?  If differences became a matter of simple discussion instead of angry debate?  If our attacks focused on the enemy instead of each other?

Here is the reality of the situation- we are in a desperate hour.  The lost, the broken, the hopeless surround us.  The harvest, my friends, is ready- but the workers are few, and too busy building walls of division to make a difference.  Will we see in time?  Will we decide in time that some things are not worth fighting over?  Will we wake up, tear down the walls we have built, move forward together with the Gospel, and be the salt of the earth? Or have we all together lost our savor?

When Calvin Met the Arminians at Subway

Sitting here in Subway, I cannot help but think about the reality that eons ago it was predetermined that I would be sitting here in this Subway, typing away on my laptop…  The fact that every detail was predestined, even down to the Dr. Pepper I am sipping on, and the muscle cramp starting to form in my leg, given to me by a very uncomfortable wooden chair that was predestined to be made, sold, and placed in this very Subway…  The two men sitting across the restaurant from me, munching their sandwiches, obviously have no idea that their visit was pre-planned; the man asking for Provolone cheese on his deli delight just doesn’t get that he is not really choosing to have it- it is just an involuntary part of the course of his life, a life that he makes no real decisions but instead is carefully guided, step by step, by the hand of God.

On the flip side, I cannot help but think about the reality that eons ago God decided that He would not interfere, not one iota(as my parents would say), in the path of my life that has landed me at this Subway, typing away on my laptop…  The fact that every detail is completely of my choosing, completely a result of my own hand, especially down to the Dr. pepper I am sipping on because I chose on my own to fill my cup from the fountain; even the muscle cramp starting to form in my leg is completely from my own will, because I decided that I would sit in this wooden chair that has been strategically placed before me as yet one more option in the whole cosmic scheme of things…  The two men munching their sandwiches across the restaurant from me are not here by Divine appointment, but rather complete coincidence, sitting here completely as the result of a spur of the moment decision they made with no outside help…  And the man with the cheese?  He will have it on his deli delight if he wants it and NO ONE will take that right from him!

OK, OK…  So those are both extreme examples of the never ending debate of calvanism, arminianism, and all the junk that falls somewhere in the middle…  I must admit, that most people on both sides are not nearly as, shall we say, fanatical as I have just portrayed them to be…  But then, that isn’t exactly my point in what I am about to say anyway. 

Here is the deal; while I may have overdramatized the thought processes of those who boil down their theology to the name of some Biblical scholarly scholar from “eons” ago(or as I would state, some dead guy), I did not overdramatize the fact that there is a clear distinction, a clear difference, between them.  Now I am not talking about the kind of difference that leads one man to choose coke and another pepsi; but rather, it is a distinction that too many times leads to division.

Understand, I have been thinking on this subject for a little over a year now.  I have friends who, as the old saying goes, are on both sides of the aisle.  And as I have thought about this very fascinating discussion of whether or not God predestines people to Heaven and Hell, I have also been observing the people who ascribe to both sides of the coin(myself included).  I watch how they behave, how they live out their faith, and their attitude towards those who believe differently on this subject.  NOW wait a minute- before any of my friends get upset with me- no, I wasn’t just observing you.  I was also taking notes on so many others I know, and reviewing notes from people I have known in my past.

I have also read on the subject, even plodding through my Biblical commentaries written by Mr. John Calvin, as well as some of his other writings. Even more importantly, I have read the scriptures…  After all, what better place to find out about a subject than from the Word right?

And I have come to my conclusion…  Which is the point of my musing on this subject tonight…  I think that the best way to explain my thoughts on this is to take you back one more time to Subway, looking at the scene from what I believe may be Christ’s perspective(based on what I have read in the Bible)…

Sitting here in Subway, I am stunned at the thought that a stinking wretch like me could be in the presence of God even here, as I type away on my laptop.  It is made possible only and completely because of never ending Grace and Mercy shown to me by the love of Christ, and His sacrifice.  The Dr. Pepper I am sipping on reminds me of His provision(even if it is unhealthy); the cramp that is starting to form in my leg reminds me of the hope that one day I will be in a place where there will be no more pain and sorrow.  The two men munching on their sandwiches remind me of the fact that He cares enough to provide for their needs whether they know Him or not, and a reminder that He has commanded us to take the Gospel to every creature- the Gospel that the Creator of the universe wants to break bread with even them, if they would believe on the Gospel and be saved…  The man choosing provolone for his sandwich?  What decisions has he made that brought him to this point in his life?  What pain and sorrow, what guilt and brokenness does he carry, and who- if anyone- has offered him the One thing that will cause him to never hunger again- the entrance to a land flowing with milk and honey?

In short, I guess what I am saying is that while it is an interesting discussion, and that we should be getting in scripture and asking God for wisdom on this- and all doctrine; we  must NOT in the process loose sight of the goal!  God did not say to take our understanding of doctrines and theologies to all the world- rather, He commanded that we take the GOSPEL to all nations.  The Gospel is much simpler than the doctrine of predestination, I think.  It is simply this- that we are born sinners, hopelessly lost, enemies of God, worthy of His wrath, on a path for eternal damnation with no chance of reconciliation to God- except for this; that God showed his love for us in this, that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us- That He so loved the world, that He gave His only Begotten Son, that whoever believes on Him- that whoever confesses with their mouth Jesus is Lord and believes in their heart that God has raised Him from the dead- shall be saved!

Now in case you are wondering why I am addressing this- because too often we let this doctrine divide us.  A Body united, so it goes… but too often we are a Body divided.  I guess you could say I wonder how much more of an impact we Christians could have if we concentrated on working together to spread the Gospel instead of fighting each other!  Let’s get something straight- not one single person has been or ever will be saved because they believed in Calvanism; not one soul has been rescued from the fires of hell because they chose to believe in Arminianism; and no one has experienced the saving Grace of God by experiencing an adherence to the middle ground… 

So here I am, sitting here in Subway, thinking about these different doctrinal stances that I have pondered for the past year, finally ready to state where I stand: I do not align myself with Calvanism; nor do I align myself with Arminianism; and I cede the middle ground to others to whom it means far more than I.  My position is a position of realization that, at the end of the day, it is the belief in Christ that matters, a trusting of His Word even when it challenges what I am comfortable with, and a love for my brothers and sisters in Christ that is deeper than any division and greater than any devisive spirit that really matters.  Now enough with the discussion, let’s focus on following Christ, and letting Him use us to change the