Space Reborn: Bleeding Out

I have long been an advocate for young earth creationism. Evolution, though pushed by the scientific community at large, is not a theory you will find me clinging to. 

However...

One thing I have learned is that, evolution of life is true. Now before you wonder if my beliefs have changed, let me explain: I am not talking about Darwin's ramblings, but rather, the evolution of our thoughts, our minds, our hearts.

Perhaps it is best to outline it this way: I am not the same person I was yesterday. Or the day before. Or even 10 years before. Who I am has, in a sense, evolved. It has changed. My life and soul have begun the process of bleeding out what I once was, and has been bleeding it out for a very long time. 

I am no longer the brash young man, but rather, have evolved into someone more thoughtful, and hopefully more wise. Someone who attempts to be more kind, more merciful, more... human... while remembering others, even those whom I find disagreement and fault with, are also human.

I pray to God that I continue this process of bleeding out the old man, and evolving into the new one- the one whom is Christ like in nature, in truth, in hope, in love.  After all, He says that anyone who is in Christ is a new creation... and that new creation is so much more, so much better than the old.

This is space, reborn.

Let Love Shine

     There was another shooting today: Twenty four shot, five dead, they tell us.  In of all places, a town in Texas... 

     I may be off my rocker here, but it seems to me that there has been a pretty large increase in shootings lately.  It makes me long for the days when I was a kid- when stories like this rarely, if ever, highlighted the evening news.  People just didn't go around shooting others.  It is not that it never happened, it just was so rare that it was practically unheard of!  It also makes me brokenhearted for this generation, who just can't seem to get away from news about shootings...
   
     I am no scholar, nor am I a great philosopher; therefore, I will shy away from the idea that I can somehow solve the great mystery of why humanity has lost it's mind.  Nor am I a conspiracy theorist, so I will not follow Alice and her flag down the rabbit hole of endless possibilities.  It seems anyone can think of an interesting (and often cazy) scenario if they stare at their t.v. too long...
   
     I think it would be a tragedy to politicize the events of the day, though I know people on every side of government and media are already drooling at the mouth with the narrative possibilities to push their respective agendas.  I will, instead, remind you of my thoughts- and hopefully they will help to illuminate something we all need to remember.
   
     There is, in this world, evil.  Evil has many names and wears many faces.  Sometimes he appears as a gunman. Sometimes he appears as betrayer.  Sometimes we think he is a friend...  But often, we cannot control how he will arrive.  We can only control how we react.  And in reaction, we can control what evil can and cannot do to us.

     The easy response to evil is fear or anger.  These are easy emotions for us to release; and they easily manipulate us like a puppet on strings.  In many cases, others will see our reactions of fear and anger as opportunity- and often those very people are the ones who pull the strings that now dictate further feelings and actions.  But that is not the best or most beneficial response.

     I implore you instead, that you react in kindness and love.  Instead of uncontrolled breakdowns, take hold of your emotions.  Instead of going into attack mode, seek out others to show love and compassion to.  When we react in said fear and anger, too often we reflect the very evil we hate.  But perhaps if we instead set aside ourselves for a moment, and determine that evil will not beget more evil in our hearts; if we instead embrace love, mercy, compassion- perhaps then we can begin to unravel the hatred that has gripped us by the neck. 

Let us live like we love, even in darkness- so that our light may shine in the blackest of places.

In The Name Of Love

                Marting Luther King Jr. once said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.  Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”  It is that thought that echoes in my mind as I think about the ever famous chapter 13 in the Apostle Paul’s letter to the church, the letter of 1 Corinthians- the chapter commonly referred to as “The Love Chapter”; arguably one of the most famous passages in Scriptures.  As Adolf Harnack once said, it is “the greatest, strongest, deepest thing Paul ever wrote”.  So please, for a moment, entertain my thoughts as I discuss this most critical piece of literature.

In our life, in our culture, in the history there can be no doubt of a certain struggle that has plagued humanity since the dawn of time.  It is the never-ending war with hate.  There are many different theories as to why this is, even amongst the greatest minds of theology.  And while we can argue over whether it is total depravity, some outside influence of an evil force, or the environment in which we are raised- there is no arguing the fact that hate has had a predominant hand in all of the human tragedies caused by the hand of another.  Hate has been more deadly than all plagues known to man; and yet, rather than fight for a cure, we dive more deeply into it. 

My friends, this ought not to be.  When we all see that sin that causes so much death enveloping us like a poisonous fog, the answer is not to continue breathing in the toxin; rather, we should flee it to the only cure known to man, the only solution to bring us from this chasm- Love. 

But instead of love, we find ourselves pitted against each other over petty things.  We instead turn to exalting things about ourselves that, without love, are completely irrelevant.  We think ourselves holy in the exercise of our spirituality, talents and gifts; yet in the absence of love, and therefore, in the absence of God Himself- who looks away from our self-glorifying works.  We believe ourselves to be something wonderful; yet when lacking love, we are just an empty shell.

It is for this very reason that we find Paul addressing the Corinthian Church on matters of love.  They had fallen into the trap of the Pharisee, seeing the great and marvelous actions at their own hand; listening to their own muttered prayers and supposed speaking in tongues of angels; holding themselves upon a pedestal above others.  When one felt he was “blessed” with a gift, he would look down upon another whom he felt was less blessed, not as righteous as he.  They would boast in their gifts while ignoring the glaring issue that all they did was vacant of love for God and love for others.

This was the background for chapter 13.  In 12, Paul first addressed the use of gifts and the reality that what you do outwardly is not a sign of how great you are within; in fact, he writes, that each person with their unique gift was imperative to the work of Christ and to the church as a whole.  He concludes by saying, “But earnestly desire the greater gifts- And I show you a still more excellent way.”  (12:31)

And what is that most excellent way?  Paul makes it abundantly clear: Love.  He begins 13 with three very direct statements concerning works and gifts: “If I speak with tongues of men and angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or clanging cymbal.  If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.  And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.”

This is the first and most basic understanding of love.  Righteousness is not being able to do wonderful things.  Look at some of the things that Paul points out- “If I can speak with tongues of men and angels”- does it really matter if I have the most eloquent of speech?  Does it matter if I can hold the attention of thousands, if I can speak with the proverbial golden tongue if love is devoid of my speech? No; for without love, I am in the end only muttering useless sounds that are unintelligible to the soul.  He goes on to state that having all knowledge, having understanding of mysteries, gifts of prophecy or great faith- are useless knowledge and useless faith without love.  In fact he very directly says having these gifts without love reduces him to nothing!  And he wraps up this section by saying that though he make great sacrifice in his life, if not done in love, it profits him absolutely nothing.  So then, the question must be asked- if these things practiced on their own merit are useless, what then is love?  If love is the key, what is it?  And of greater importance, what impact can love- when understood in it’s true concept- have on this world of hate in which we live?

We are most fortunate that Paul must have anticipated this question to be asked for centuries to come.  He takes the remaining time in chapter 13 to help us have complete understanding of this most sacred word.  He breaks it down as such: 7 examples of what love is, and 8 examples of what love is not.  While this explanation is helpful to us, it also served a secondary purpose.  As John Calvin stated, “I have also no doubt that he designed indirectly to reprove the Corinthians, by setting before them a contrast, in which they might recognize, by way of contraries, their own vices.”

So let us first take a look at the 8 things Paul identifies as the opposite of love:  1. Not jealous 2. Does not brag 3. Is not arrogant 4. Does not act unbecomingly 5. Does not seek its own 6. Is not provoked 7. Does not take account of wrong 8. Does not rejoice in unrighteousness.  Some of these should be pretty self explanatory; however, let us take a brief moment to look a little deeper.

The first, that love lacks jealousy, speaks to the reality that you cannot look at what another has and covet it.  How can you love that person if you cannot take your mind off what they own?  If you feel that what God has gifted them belongs more rightfully to you, then you are exalting yourself above them.  In a more intimate relationship, jealousy can look different- behaving as a territorial primate, demanding to control their every move.  This also does not show forth love, for in a figurative sense, you have caged them and attempt to control their freedom.  This is not something love would do.

In the same respect, love does not brag and is not arrogant, nor does it seek its own.  These three go together, as they both- once again- involve exalting self.  As long as you are your main focus in the relationship, love will be absent.  For how can you attend to the need of another if you are constantly looking out for your own?  How can you love a person whom you constantly belittle or degrade, either through word or action?

Love does not act unbecomingly, Calvin again refers to this as acting ostentatious- which means a vulgar display intended to impress or attract notice.  Once again, this is an action solely on yourself.  Perhaps once again, Paul may have been thinking about relationships in the Body of Christ, as the Corinthians were struggling with spiritually vulgar actions meant to draw attention to themselves…  But I digress.

Finally, love does not take account of wrong, is not easily provoked and does not rejoice in unrighteousness…  I think the main overall thought is, that once again, love puts our feelings aside for the greater good of the relationship.  Rather than focus on the negative, love lets go for the sake of peace.  My feelings are sacrificed for the sake of love, expecting nothing in return.

Paul counters with a good description of what love is.  After very vividly painting that love of self is the opposite of love for others, he shows us clearly the lesson we must learn if we are to survive, not only as a culture, but as the Body of Christ.  Love is patient, love is kind- when we deal with others, our compassion must shine through! Love rejoices in truth- for even though truth may hurt, lies and deception are much more destructive.  Love bears and endures all things- right or wrong, good or bad, love will carry the burden through to the end- as our wedding vows say, til death do us part.  Love believes all things, love hopes all things…  Paul is essentially writing that no matter how dark, love never gives up.  It presses forth, holding fast to hope above all.

Paul then ends the section by stating that love never fails.  This is why Paul said it is a much more excellent way.  Because every other gift given, whether tongues or healing or prophecy- these things are not eternal.  These things will fade.  These things will come to an end.  Material possessions and gifts will blow away like the wind.  But love- love is eternal. Love can never fail.  Love never ceases.  Love never ends.

The gifts that the Corinthians seem so enamored with, are likened unto things needed for our spiritual immaturity.  They are the gifts of spiritual children.  We see the mysteries of God through a dim glass, but when they have fallen away, and only love is left behind- when we enter eternity with no need of tongues and prophecies- then we will see clearly.  Then we will have reached our full spiritual maturity.  It is what we should strive for.  It is what should be our motivation.  It should be the one action (for love is not a feeling, but a verb) that we stress more than any other when dealing with our brothers and sisters in Christ- and with the lost. 

Love is, the more excellent way.

Death of a Legacy: The End of Hate

I saw this picture the other day, and it struck me.  It was taken at a KKK rally in 1992, and here we see this small child, too young to really know what the outfit he is wearing even means, staring at his reflection...  I wonder to myself where this child is now.  What does he think when he sees this photograph?  Is he hateful?  Does the KKK represent his values?  Does he see himself for who he really is?

Hate is such a powerful force in this world.  But as with all things, hate must come to an end.  And in time, it will.  Take, for example, the case of one hateful Fred Phelps.  Phelps was the pastor of a pseudo-church that made a habit of spreading hate. The Westboro band spread their brand by hauling signs to funerals proclaiming "God Hates Fags", and though their message was very "loud and proud", they clearly demonstrated by their lack of church size that hate is a losing message.

I say, "was the pastor", because Mr. Phelps is now dead.  One can only hope that his message will die with him; but that is not why I am writing this piece.  The thoughts that run through my mind at the moment are a mixed bag of nuts, but I will try and sort them out in brief fashion...

First off, I find it important to express to the reader, that Mr. Phelps does not represent the teachings of Christ, or the Bible.  Now I know you may be thinking, "But I thought the Bible taught that homosexuality was a sin?" You are exactly right.  It does.  But it also teaches that adultery is a sin. And it teaches that pornography and lust of the heterosexual nature are sins. Ironically, it also teaches that gossip, greed, jealousy, and gluttony are also all sins- with the same end result.  And most importantly, it teaches that hate is not only a sin- but a sin equal to murder in the eyes of God.

So, there we have it. Mr. Phelps may have been right that homosexuality is a sin; but he was in no better place, as biblically speaking, he would be compared to a murderer.  His actions were equally offensive to God.  The darkness in his heart tainted and distorted any truth his message may have had...

As Christians, it is imperative that we understand one thing: Love.  Yes, we are to stand for what is right. Yes, we are to be speakers of truth. Yes, we are called by God to preach repentance of sins. But we are also called by God to love. There MUST be a balance.  Paul wrote so very eloquently in 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 that our words may be the best words- but if they are spoken without love, they are just noise; that our wisdom and knowledge may be top notch, but if it is void of love, then it is nothing; and that our actions may astound the world, but if they are done without love as the motive, it will gain us nothing in the end.

And that is just what Mr. Phelps gained for all his life's work- nothing. Let us not ridicule him, or wish him safe journeys to hell- for in so doing we lower ourselves to his level. But rather let us look to him as a warning beacon for what happens when we allow bitterness, unforgiveness, and hate to rule our hearts. Let us examine ourselves in honesty and truth, and allow the Holy Spirit to convict us if love is not our motive.  And let us find ourselves always acting with all love, for if Christ so loved the world- so should we.

Political Reflections From the Corners of My Mind

Life has a funny way of changing course on you.  One moment you think you are heading towards the east, then you encounter a cerebral shift and are headed west.  They call them the winds of change, and they ever blow as you travel this life's journey.  So has been the case with me.

A year ago, I was seriously thinking about an eventual career in politics.  I had recently been elected Precinct Committeeman and Vice Chairman for my district, in the Canyon County Republican Party.  I was given tasks such as creating a facebook page for the Central Committee, and notifying the newspapers of upcoming events.  I think at one time I was given the title "Chairman of Public Relations"...  It was kind of an odd duck fit, since really I knew very little of what I was doing, and didn't ask for the positions.  They just all sort of... happened.  I was liked by people both of the establishment and non-establishment persuasion.  Things were progressing well, for someone who was an absolute novice with future political aspirations. 

Then as I was staring in at the pitcher one evening, he threw me a curveball.  The freaky thing is, I was expecting a fastball.  In laymen's terms, life took one of it's unusual twists.

I had done some minor P.R. work for a man who was running for office; I didn't know him, but after talking a bit with him, felt confident he would stand for my values.  He had a specific promise- that he would vote against the State Insurance Exchange.  It was his big selling point, especially since his opponent was campaigning for it.  I bought his schpeel; I wrote letters to the editor for him, I got others to do the same.  I monitored public forums, making sure he got a positive spin.  I put my name with his... and then, when he was elected, he went back on his promise and voted for said State Exchange.  Umm, yeah, I still have your election literature that says... oh, never mind...

I was... quite frustrated.  But, I am a forgiving person...  So when another legislator drafted an amendment that would offer protections to religious employers, I approached him, asking him to at least support it.  He promised that he would support life and religious liberty, and that I needn't worry- all would be well.  I believed him.  The very next day he went out and voted against it.

I should note that this man was a conservative republican.  As were many other elected officials here in this state who, despite public outcry, voted for what they thought best as opposed to the will of the people.  This was a huge awakening moment for me...  As I realized that all men in politics, regardless of ideology or party affiliation, are the same.  With few exception, they clock in to the state house, they vote for what will best build their kingdom, and the people are left wondering what happened to their knight in shining armor that was supposed to be "The One".

It was in this moment in life that I came to the astonishing conclusion that very little done on the battlefield of politics is relevant to the end game.  The system is rigged for failure; it is only a matter of time until this train crashes head on into the wall it is racing toward. And we, the general public, are left with the all important question: Do we carry on with this quest? Or do we divert to something that will have lasting impact?

Everyone must answer that question for themselves; for me, the answer is to refocus and to redeem the time.  I have set aside my political aspirations. I have stepped out of any future election races.  Lasting change can only be won on one battleground: the heart.  As I pointed out to a dear friend of mine, even if all you want were to come to fruition, even if you got the leaders and the laws the way you want- if the heart of the people remains as is, in four years your efforts will vanish like a vapor. 

At the end of the day, I do not believe in stressing over the possibilities of what may or may not happen anyway.  This country may be in a bad place, but I also know how things are going to end.  Instead of stressing, perhaps we as Christians should be living in joy over the knowledge that light WILL overcome the darkness.  Time is short, and perhaps we Christians have spent too much time going crazy over a pagan society being run by a pagan president and the choices they make.  Remember, we are not of this world.  Our primary concern is not restoring the kingdom of America- but building the kingdom of God. 

Changing a law lasts only a moment; changing a heart lasts for eternity.

Thow out the Baby With the Bathwater!

It has been too long since my last entry...  I think it is time to start this back up again... So, here we go:

I have been noticing a disturbing trend in society.  What is it, you ask? Is it that there seems to be an increase in violence? Well, that may be true, and that certainly does play in to what is on my mind, but no.  Nor is it any relation to drugs or politics, or comedies that just aren't comedy-ic.  I have observed, that it seems we are too much anymore a throw away society. 

What I mean is, we throw away important things way too quickly, for reasons that are just heartbreaking when you examine them.  Do you know what I am talking about?  Let me start with this example:  Marriage.  Because we are a fast-food society (I want it now, so I am going to get it now), people often rush into marriage long before they should.  They get that goose-bumpy feeling whenever their crush walks by and they think they are in love... ah, sweet love!  So they look past reality and plunge straight into a serious relationship.  And then marriage.  And then the slightest bump comes along, and all of a sudden that goose-bumpy feeling is gone.  The thought floods into our head that obviously, we are no longer in love.  The end result? A quick run down to divorce court.  "My husband just can't stand the fact that I buy creamy peanut butter instead of crunchy." "My wife gets so upset because I watch too many sports, and I am not giving that up." Or whatever the case may be.

The end result is, broken hearts, broken families.  Usually over something stupid. Or over a refusal to forgive.

But it doesn't only involve marriages.  It goes to friendships as well.  We find the people who we believe think like us . We spend time with them.  We invest in them. We pour our hearts into them.  Bonds and memories are built; while we tell ourselves that it will last a lifetime.  But what happens in our society when one friend offends another?  People who were once unseperable, who were the proverbial "two peas in a pod", walk away angry, hurt, and bitter. 

I think the saddest part of this is, that from my personal observations, in almost all cases it was something not worth fighting over.  Either there was a miscommunication- which most offenses are, by the way- or it is once again, the lack of forgiveness over things that are not that serious of an offense when we really examine it.

Once again, there is those words- a lack of forgiveness. I know that too often in my life, I have demonstrated this.  I think if we are honest, we all have.  And what are we left with?  Regret. Hurt feelings. Wishing things could have been different, but refusing to be the first to budge. Refusing to admit that maybe- just maybe- we were wrong, and we just contributed to this new trend of a throw-away society.

Jesus demonstrated perfectly what must be done when we are offended.  You see, we offended Him- and we still do! Yet He was willing to look past that and stand in our place in judgement.  When He was on the cross, he did not curse those who nailed Him there. He didn't even demonstrate anger. Instead, He said "Father, forgive them." 

I think it is time we buck the trend.  There are already too many broken hearts and broken relationships.  If someone or something is important to you, then hold on to it. Hold on to it with all your might.  If someone offends you, don't be so quick to walk away.  Work through it!  So much time has already been invested- why waste that? 

Too often, important things are thrown to the trash heap...  And we will only be left with regret.  We will find, at the end of the day, that if we conform to this throw away mentality- the person we end up hurting the most, is ourselves.

Of Hope and Fairness in Connecticut

I will be honest...  There are many times in life that I wish things were fair.  Many times that I sit down, examine personal events, or events in the world around me, and wish that life was fair.  There are even times I pray to God that He would make it fair.  It just doesn't seem right, the way things play out.  It doesn't seem... fair.  And yet, despite my pleas, life moves on along the same track, the idea of fair foreign to it's native language, a word not uttered by it's mocking tongue.  No matter how much I would like for it to be different, that track it rolls down is a hard and abusive one, with dips and cracks and breaks and falls and sometimes- derailments.  It doesn't seem fair because shouldn't that track be smooth?  In a perfect world, yes... but in this world...

I will be honest...  Today was a day that I cried out to God, wanting desperately for Him to make life fair.  Not for me, no- but for twenty little children.  Not for me, no- but for the parents of those 20 children.  Not for me, no- but for the grandparents, the brothers, the sisters, the aunts, the uncles, the cousins, the friends, for all of those who quite literally had their hearts torn from their chest and could do nothing but watch life stomp frantically on that heart, stomp it into the ground until it stopped beating, broken beyond any repair that mankind can offer... 

Oh, God- please make life fair for them.

People across this Country saw the news, the tragedy.  26 people dead.  20 of them children.  Kindergartners.  Children between the ages of 5-8.  The calls have gone out for people to pray.  Pray!  We were told.  Pray for the families!  Voices pleaded.  I am no stranger to prayer, but I must again be honest and say that prayer was a stranger to me today.  Not because I was unwilling- but because I didn't have words.  All I could do was weep for so many broken hearts.  All I could think about was those parents who had bought and wrapped Christmas presents, placed neatly under the tree, that will never be opened.  All I could think about was parents who, a week ago, were stressed about putting cookies out for Santa- are now at a loss because their children are no longer there to share cookies with.  All I could think about was parents who have gone from planning Christmas dinners- to planning funerals. 

Some of you reading this may think me crazy.  After all, I did not know one single victim in today's tragedy.  So how, pray tell, could I get so upset, so worked up, over the deaths of children I did not even know!  But I dare say, that if you do not get upset, if this does not bother you, if this does not weigh heavy on your heart- then you are the one who is crazy.  While it is true this happened several states away, in Connecticut- somewhere I have never even visited for a moment- it is equally true that it could have happened here.  It is equally true that it very easily could have been a child I knew, a family I knew that was broken.  It could have been- my child.

Evil exists here as much as anywhere else in the world.  Life is not more fair here in my neck of the woods.  They say justice is blind, and that may be true- but it is not as blind as tragedy.  And while we gather around our t.v.'s trying to catch glimpses of a madman's motive, there is a  deeper question that must be answered.  It is  question that, if we dare look in the mirror of our soul, we will see staring us in the face.  We must ask ourselves- what if it was  my child?  What if it was my loved one?  What if it was my mom or dad, my grandparent, my brother, my sister, my friend?  Would we bury our loved ones in grief?  Or would we bury them in shame?  Would we treasure our moments we had with them?  Or would we regret the moments we didn't have?  Even worse- would we regret the moments we did have?  Those moments of anger, those moments, of irritation, those moments of frustration, those moments that once tragedy strikes we wish we could have every single one back if just to hold  for one more minute...

With today officially coming to a close, I finally have some words to form into a prayer.  I pray that today you will remember, that there are some things in life more important than getting the newest i-phone or gaming system.  I pray you remember that anger is not worth holding on to.  I pray that you remember that always being right isn't always what is best.  I pray that you make amends, that you allow healing in broken relationships, that this year for Christmas you give forgiveness...  I pray that, as a parent, never let your last words to them be harsh or angry, make sure they know you love them, make sure you hold them close to your heart.  I pray you treasure every stupid joke, every out of tune song that is sung, every question they ask that you don't understand why they are asking you again for the hundredth time...

Because once a treasure is gone, there is no getting it back.

Finally, I pray that you look to this time of year.  I pray that we would all be reminded, when faced with tragedy, the whole point of the first Christmas- to show us that even in our darkest hour there is hope.  Jesus Christ the Son of God was not born into a world that didn't need healing- He was born into a world that is unfair, tragic, and beyond any repair offered by man.  The first Christmas- His birthday- was to remind us that there is light, there is hope, there is healing from God if we seek it- even on the darkest day in Connecticut...

"The Lord heals the broken hearted, and binds up their wounds..."  Psalm 147:3